The Power in Forgiving

Some people believe that forgiveness is sold in cycles during the holidays; however, there is nothing further from the truth than that. Unforgiveness kills and if you want to die between the holidays then hold on to it. If you want to be free any day of the year; forgive and make it a habit.  You will be forever glad you did.

In watching the Real Housewives franchise there is yes much drama; but some lessons we can learn if we pay attention.  Last night’s episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County yet again provides us much for discussion.

I already wrote about Tamra Barney and how not hearing the words, ‘I love you’ impacted her life so for today I want to focus on forgiveness. In listening to her speech and seeing her and her mother interact the pain of their lives is evident. The unforgiveness of what occurred is something still keeping them from growing together. Not only this; the unforgiveness that each of them hold toward themselves too is there as well. You see; forgiveness softens the heart while unforgiveness steals your joy and keeps you living as a victim and not victor. It destroys and it’s a slow death.  In your life how much pain from the past are you holding on to? How free would you like to be?

In the situation between Heather and Terry we see much the same. Here is a husband groveling for forgiveness while Heather lets him continuously do so all the while at one point makes the comment to him that he needs to let it go; yet here she is still holding on to her own unforgiveness toward him. How many times does someone have to apologize before you truly let it go?  Wasn’t it Peter who asked Jesus how many times do we need to forgive and it was well beyond the ‘7’ times he thought!

In both situations unforgiveness is something holding them back. How much of your unforgiveness is holding you back? Isn’t it time to let it go?

It will change your life when you make the choice to do so. From personal experience; I forgave my biological mother for the decisions she made that impact my life and guess what? My life changed! Not only this; my eye color and my voice changed too . We now have a great relationship that never could have been so long as I harbored that unforgiveness.

You see; unforgiveness doesn’t play alone. Don’t be fooled. Unforgiveness brings the entire family with it.  Resentment, bitterness, anger, fear of abandonment, rejection, ego, overly opinionated, vanity; victim mentality and many many more relatives to anyone unsuspecting of its wicked ways. It brings a slow death.

I encourage you today to be brave. I encourage you to look deep in the mirror and get beyond yourself and truly forgive those who have hurt you. Will it hurt? Probably; but it will hurt you more in the long run if you don’t. Does it matter what the other person or people did that hurt you? No more or less than what you have done to others. It has nothing to do with them anyway. Forgiving is about you and your life; and internal freedom. It’s time now to let it go and become the you that you were created to be.  Don’t let another minute of your life be taken. Trust me; I lost more than 2 decades. It simply is not worth it. Give the best give to yourself today and forgive.