A Champion of Forgiveness
When it comes to forgiveness and history; school textbooks have it wrong. Gone are the stories of valor and real history. Even in some texts the Holocaust has been removed because it’s considered offense and in it’s place are the likes of Miley Cyrus and Beyonce in institutions such as Rutgers. In such a time and place of this; we need to be reminded of heroes and not antics of those who enjoy the debauchery of their day all for self glorification. And today is the day for sharing forgiveness, history; and a hero not much talked about in today’s time. Wherever you are in the world you have your own hero. I’m sure those of you in Israel you won’t soon forget Har-Zion.
The story of Father Kapuan is one that every American should know. Emil Kapaun-priest, soldier and Korean War hero and one who exudes it. He was awarded the Medal of Honor, the nation’s highest military award, and is considered by the Vatican for canonization as a saint. President Obama also recognized him for his service in 2013. (https://www.youtube.com/embed/AZuPrQBSDCs) Now one does not need a Pope or president to declare one as a servant of the Lord; although the man made recognition is not one that most receive or experience. It is wonderful that such accolades are bestowed upon someone who actually did something useful and for the advancement of his fellow man; and not just his own pocketbook at the cost of the consumer. We need to look at the character of such men and women today who stand up to be hero’s and not forget that being a real hero comes sacrifice. Father Kapaun time and time again sacrificed much; but for the gain much larger than even he may have recognized. The level of love and forgiveness in his heart is the purest example.
In reflection of the actions of this man he displayed love. He displayed courage. He displayed strength above all. In his sound mind he stood up to the enemy without fear. Psalm 118: 6 best references him: ‘The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?’
It is not possible to walk in love while being unforgiving. Father Kapaun understood this. He did all he did walking in love and forgiveness. He saved lives. He lived his life walking as a soldier of war but also a soldier for God. What a man to be able to have lived doing both all the while leaving none behind; regardless of where or who they were.
So it is cause for question: Where are you today? What are you walking in? What choices are you making to better not only your life but of those around you? When you recognize what is in your heart you will see the power you have; to infect or impact.
Forgiveness and unforgiveness alike a revealed in every single one of us. There is no way to deny this. This man, this hero; Father Kapuan is a reflection of forgiveness and love. His life and story reveal it. What is yours? Is it what you want it to be? If not then make the change and make it so. Start with forgiveness so you can love- and then love some more. Be the hero that you were created to be!
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When it comes to forgiveness; there is much that people do not understand. The health benefits of forgiveness is just one area of forgiveness that changes people’s lives. What occurs internally is reflected externally; therefore dealing with the unforgiveness and its symptoms will not only change your health but your life too.
Some basic health benefits of forgiveness are:
1. Lower blood pressure. When a person lives in unforgiveness even the mention of the person or situation that brought the unforgiveness brings an increase in blood pressure. The very thought of what occurred in the past is where it begins and it’s rooted in still living in unforgiveness. When unforgiveness is dealt with to the full; any mention of a person or past situation will have no impact of change to blood pressure or emotional flare-up.
2. Less depression. Unforgiveness keeps people in a state of depression. Why? Because unforgiveness keeps people living and focusing on people and events of the past; all of which are not the most pleasing or happy. When time is given to negative and hurtful things in your mind it will then progress to behaviors, actions and attitudes toward it. If you want to get free from depression; forgive.
3. Less arthritis. Arthritis has been linked to unforgiveness. The spill over of bitterness is also deep rooted because bitterness is spiritual poison. When the joints and bones start rotting there is a clue that something spiritual is taking place. What you see coming out of a person is from within. Psalm 31:10 “For my life is spent with sorrow, my years with sighing. My strength fails because of my iniquity [guilt]. My bones are wasted away.”
Making forgiveness your lifestyle should be a priority; moreso than taking any medication that merely masks it. Forgiveness will change your life. For me the benefits are huge! My eye color and my voice changed once I dealt with all the unforgiveness that plagued my life for decades. My relationships have changed for the better as has my health. So I ask you: how is your health? If you want better health then start forgiving. Ask the Lord and Holy Spirit to reveal to you where that unforgiveness is; and to whom you need to forgive. Don’t deceive yourself into thinking you are so above it- as that too will only lead you to your own path of destruction. Get forgiving and get the healing that will free you and your future!
Forgiveness and unforgiveness are a part of life. There is no doubt at some point in your life you will be faced with a decision: to forgive or not to forgive. And as such; regret will be a factor in that decision. Regret can serve as an impediment to the level of forgiveness a person is able to receive and give. Regret of not spending more time with your family, putting your career first; not making the big play; or simply not giving your all can wreck havoc on your life. You can overcome regret to receive forgiveness in full.
How does regret play a part in your life in forgiveness? 3 simple ways:
1. Regret keeps you suffering from past mistakes. 2 Corinthians 7:10 tells us, ‘For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.’ People make mistakes. We all do. There was a time in my life where I knew I was forgiven; yet when certain things were brought up I felt an instant level of regret. I knew I was moving forward and didn’t understand how if I were forgiven I will still suffering. See; I didn’t at the time know that regret was like the virus scan program operating in the background of my life. Even though I was drawn to my savior Jesus I did not know regret was still an issue. Once I understood the impact of it- my life changed! It felt like I instantly lost 20lbs. I didn’t need to suffer any longer. And neither do you. Forgiveness took it all away. What a revelation!
2. Regret keeps you focused on yourself. Similar to shame; regret keeps you focused on what you could or should have done. Yes; sure you know someone forgave you yet you haven’t fully received it. Why? Because your regret keeps you continuously thinking and reliving what you could or should have done or not done to change the situation that has already taken place. Your focus of thought impacts every area of your life- and those thoughts first impact you. When regret is the main focus your life will not be free. Isa 43:18-19 “Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” When you are focused on the mistakes you have made you are not 1) focused on the things above, 2) moving forward, 3) living in the forgiveness bestowed to you. Your focus is disallowing you to be. Your focus on you is your biggest problem. When I was faced with the mistakes of my past I knew I was forgiven; yet I was more distant from the Lord and couldn’t figure out why. Regret. Simple as that. My regret kept me focusing on me instead of the Lord and the blessing He gave me in the gift of forgiveness. Is it the same for you?
3. Regret disallows forgiveness to flow. Regret is an obstacle; a hindrance to the flow of forgiveness. It is like the dam that blocks the river waters. Forgiveness is there; but it can’t fully operate because the level of regret is too high. It doesn’t allow you to see what you have been given, that the mistakes of the past are not to be lived and relived. The past is gone; but a thought of yesterday. If you harbor it- it will hinder you and ultimately will kill you. If someone forgave you; why then would you allow regret to enter in and steal it? That is like leaving your door open for someone to rob you all the while paying for a wonderful insurance plan. And who does that?
It took me many years to realize that regret was in my way. Sure I knew forgiveness and its impact; but not much about the hindrance of regret. If you are struggling with regret of your past; whether it’s for cheating, having an abortion, drunk driving, bullying another person; or whatever single thing you have done I encourage you right now to let it go. You cannot change what you have done. You can’t. What you can do is forgive yourself and move on. Your life is too precious and your future is worth more than the regret of the mistakes you made that you have already been forgiven for. Don’t let it eat up years of your life like I did. It simply is not worth it.
Back in the day the role of the media was to report the news. Now in today’s world the media creates the news. They are the 4th branch of the government; and silenced for reporting what may not be in alignment with a current president. Does the media deserve forgiveness when not telling the truth to the public?
Should the media be granted grace and mercy for reporting untruths? Should the media be given a free pass for stirring the pot in racial riots, Benghazi; or the never ending stories about Kim K? Does the media just need to get a life?
The latest media situation or situation of untruth is regarding Brian Williams. He recently admitted on air about fabricating a story of personal heroics, claiming to have been aboard a helicopter in Iraq in 2003 when it was hit by enemy fire. Williams says, ‘“I made a mistake in recalling the events of 12 years ago,” Of course one may question how a mistake can be made in reporting that he was there when he wasn’t. And now he remembers the truth. He continues on to say in his apology: “On this broadcast last week in an effort to honor and thank a veteran who protected me and so many others after a ground-fire incident in the desert during the Iraq War invasion, I made a mistake in recalling the events of 12 years ago. It did not take long to hear from some brave men and women in the air crews who were also in that desert. I want to apologize.
“I said I was traveling in an aircraft that was hit by RPG fire. I was instead in a following aircraft. We all landed after the ground-fire incident and spent two harrowing nights in a sandstorm in the Iraq desert.
“This was a bungled attempt by me to thank one special veteran, and by extension, our brave military men and women, veterans everywhere, those who have served while I did not. I hope they know they have my greatest respect and now my apology.”
The question is: does he deserve forgiveness? Did he just diminish what those military men and women were up against to make it all about him? Didn’t he know then that what was being delivered wasn’t the full truth? And wouldn’t you think that there should be an issue with that? But apparently not right? Or is that just the norm for the media?
So it begs the question: Does he deserve it for misrepresenting the news, the truth; and his position in it? Does he deserve to lie to the public and then years later apologize with no real consequence? Does the media in general? Should they be held to a higher standard than anyone else? Or are they just people who make mistakes?
In our ever so critical world people have become more skeptical; and probably rightfully so. The media has an agenda and while it should be to report the news; more often than not they are caught in influencing the news to something of a distortion. Should there be forgiveness for knowingly doing this? Again-you decide.
One may argue that the media and most of its main stream liberal bias is nothing new, that new casters lie all the time for their own benefit; and that it should be no surprise. Others may say that news is the news and if you follow it then you are just that stupid for believing it. Either way- they are responsible for what they speak are they not? Are you not?
Do you deserve forgiveness for inflammatory remarks you make? Or the slander that you may have sometime delivered to someone else? Of course right! Because you are you. But does someone in a position of delivering the news and truth to the public deserve it too? And should it just be so easily forgiven with no consequence?
If there were consequences of termination for every journalist or politician that spoke untruths; it may be that the government would not exist and there would be no one to report about it. We all would just have more time in our day with less to talk about; and perhaps have less forgiveness to give. But then again you decide. Forgive Brian Williams for lying or not?
The journey to a win or loss is based simply upon individual and collective decisions made along the way. The outcome reveals much and for those who win it is a celebration. For those that come up short; the pain is excruciating at minimal and can last a lifetime. One may ask those who have lost. It is something that most don’t ever recover from. When losing hurts; forgiveness heals. It is the medication that no drug can heal.
There is never anything that can replace the ‘what if’s’ that come along. ‘What if’ we scored earlier? ‘What if’ we did this or that? ‘What if’there was no interception? ‘What if’ we scored earlier and more often? One will never know. ‘What if’ only leads to regret and regret; leads to the downward spiral of self-loathing and wonderment of the past. And that can lead to death. (http://uanetwork.tv/uanon-demand/living-forgiveness-julie-blair/)
Winning and losing as a team means experiencing all things as a team. ‘Sure sure’ you may think it’s simple to say collectively for the team; however, each individual experiences wins and losses differently. And this; my dear friends, is where forgiveness comes in to play.
Forgiveness heals. Regardless of the situation forgiveness heals. Does it take time to get to a place of forgiveness? Absolutely! Each person is unique and processes life’s circumstances in his or her own manner at his or her own pace. None are the same.
There must be forgiveness at some point within a team for all the mistakes made because every team’s future wins or losses are dependent upon all the people involved. The future of each person and team is based upon it. When a person makes the choice to forgive teammates for not catching the ball, not throwing it correctly; not producing at an expected level healing can begin. When a person gets to the position of forgiving him or herself for living up to the same expectations healing can begin.
Healing through forgiveness is reconciling that which was done that had unwanted consequences. It is part of life. It is a process that for a full future is needed; is vital. It is the acceptance that mistakes are part of life and that people make them. None of us are immune. Not even you. We can’t take back any moment as they pass too quickly. This moment too is passing right before your eyes.
While the large majority of us do not know what it is like to lose a Superbowl; we can all relate to making mistakes that require forgiveness. We are all part of teams in life where the people in it have let us down and we too have let teammates down. It doesn’t matter if your team is a family unit, church group or sports team. It simply doesn’t. You are part of something with other people. And people make mistakes. That alone is the simple reason why forgiveness must reign.
You have a future. Your future through forgiveness will be much different than what you ever could image at this very moment. How do I know? I am living it! I never thought that my life at this very moment through forgiveness would be what it is. Praise God! And I share this with you so that you too can live a real life that isn’t filled with the things of the past.
I was one who knew there was a call on my life; like most people. I didn’t know what it was. I didn’t know how to get to it; and I didn’t know what I didn’t know. And what I didn’t know what the one thing that had the most significant impact on my life. Forgiveness.
Forgiveness changes life. ‘Sure sure’ you may think but until you go through the full experience of forgiving you can’t quite know. Until you grasp the depth of what it is and how life changing it is you can’t know. It is no different than seeing pictures of the Eiffel Tower compared to being at the top of it or getting married in it. You can’t fully know something until you experience it.
What I have learned through forgiveness is this:
1- You are a new creation in Christ. You are never the same person. You can’t be because it is Him working in and through you and when we surrender to allowing that; we are never the same.
2- Your physical manifestations of unforgiveness are gone. When I sat in my room for 2 days dealing with ‘all’ of my unforgiveness my life changed. I knew that. What I didn’t know what that my voice changed and my eye color changed too. See; the pain and emotional turmoil we go through takes it toll. It manifests and when there is a release; the release is more than we can imagine at that current time or moment. It was huge for me!
3- Your future will come forward. When you make the choice to forgive your future; your real future can be revealed. Before I made the choice to forgive and before I understood ‘all’ of what it is and how it is life changing; I didn’t know. I didn’t know the magnitude of what good would come before me and to me. There is no way to know. When there is forgiveness in the way it blocks you from living out the fullness of what is intended for you.
I thought in the past I was living what I thought was a good life; until I started understanding what my life really was and what it was to be. Through forgiveness I was healed and could see what was really set aside for me. I could move toward life in freedom and toward purpose. Forgiveness paves the way . And it will for you too. Your life won’t be the same because you won’t be the same. Your future will be forever changed as mine was. And that is the best thing in the world.
Forgiveness is something most struggle with. It’s hard when people hurt you; or you hurt yourself. It’s hard to overcome and be the stronger person yet it’s the strong who forgive and survive.
A recent article about Mr. Mark Wahlberg and his request of a pardon for his mistakes is one of interest. In the 1986 Mr. Wahlberg was involved in a racially motivated incident. He is not unlike many others out there who are racially motivated regardless of what race. The point isn’t about what Mr. Wahlberg is or is not; which is where the story gets interesting.
Ms. Atwood was part of the group that heard the racial remarks and the rock throws from Mr. Wahlberg in 1986. Her reply about whether or not he should receive a pardon: “I don’t think he should get a pardon,” Atwood said.
“I don’t really care who he is. It doesn’t make him any exception. If you’re a racist, you’re always going to be a racist. And for him to want to erase it I just think it’s wrong,” she said.
When there is forgiveness of sins; there is freedom. Freedom for the person receiving the forgiveness and for the person giving it. When there is a harboring of judgment toward someone for his or her sins; it builds into resentment, bitterness; and judgment. Whether someone attempts to try to erase what he or she has done; is not for any of us to decide. Each person is accountable and that is that. We do not truly know the inner motives of man; but God surely does.
Through this situation Mr. Walhberg is in of interest because it isn’t new. There are people everywhere involved in race situations; Mr. Sterling being yet another. Being a racist is not a crime; it is a heart condition. Until we understand that and get to the root of the problem; we will never get to the correct solution.
When you person makes the choice to forgive; you won’t continue to request the person who hurt you to continue to suffer. You have moved beyond that. It’s about time that we wake up and recognize that forgiveness and covering the mistakes of others is a true act of love. If we don’t get that we are going to experience more than we will be able to face. So today; forgive, love; and walk in peace. 1986 is gone.
Forgiveness is a process. It is a journey and no two journeys, people or situations are alike. As such the process of forgiveness is as unique as the person in the situation forgiving and being forgiven. Where most people fall off track is the recognition that forgiveness is a process. It takes time and persistence; not just lip service. Anyone can say they forgive yet still exhibit the more than 30 symptoms that are evident in unforgiveness. Forgiveness goes deep and when you are willing to go deeper than you ever have before; you will gain and live that victorious life you were created to live.
To understand the depth of forgiveness requires recognition of forgiveness and the need for it in the first place. Forgiveness is an act; something that one does. It is not passive. It is not something that just happens because you thought about it once back in Vietnam. It is active and depending upon the act needing forgiveness; it can take longer than one realizes.
In my life I thought I forgave. I told myself I did; for more than 3 decades. It wasn’t until those with the gift of discernment that spoke truth to me and I realized the truth. I deceived myself. I had not forgiven. In fact I didn’t even know what forgiveness was! It was time for me to get real and deal with myself; my unforgiveness. It was a process and more on that but rest assured it was a process. It will be for you too but moving through the process is part of the victory. Starting somewhere to accept that it is something you need to do is the first step.
Accept that forgiveness is a process. It is your journey to internal peace and freedom. It begins with you making the choice to not allow what someone has done to you to rule your life. It is perhaps crying about the pain and allowing the release to come. It is maybe even getting mad or even angry about what happened. It is what it is but rest assured forgiveness is a process. Let it be yours today.
Forgiveness is something that impacts every single living person; regardless of anything. It doesn’t matter socioeconomic status, age, gender, marital status; nothing matters. Forgiveness impacts. Where forgiveness begins too has impact. The question is where does forgiveness begin?
Forgiveness begins in the mind. You see; forgiveness is a choice. Where do you make any choice in your day? Your mind. Sure you may feel something in your heart but regardless of what you ‘feel’ you still make the choice in your mind. The choice to purchase the fabulous pumps, eat this or that; exercise or not exercise all begin in the mind. Adam and Eve were faced with a choice to be obedient and eat from the tree. They didn’t have to make that choice; but they did. They made the choice in their mind. They knew what they should do but again; they made a choice. The wrong choice. And that was conceived in their minds.
So what is in your mind? How do you make decisions? What is the level of forgiveness that you want to achieve in your life? What is the choice that you are going to make when it comes to forgiveness?Are you going to allow how you ‘feel’ be what you live? Are your emotions ruling you? It’s not like most people want to forgive the pain that others caused; but know that it is the strong who forgive. Are you strong? Make the choice to be strong and let your mind be the residing factor of that. After all; it is where forgiveness begins.
Forgiveness is a lifestyle; just as much so is unforgiveness. Creating a lifestyle of forgiveness is doable. In fact for Believers it is a command to live a lifestyle of forgiveness. When Jesus was asked by Peter how many times one should forgive He simply replied, ‘Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.’ Matthew 18:22. Therefore; living a lifestyle of a Believer is there and available for you. Yes you! So how do you get there?
1. Recognize that you have the choice to forgive. The choice to forgive is yours. The choice to not forgive is also yours. When choosing a lifestyle that you want that brings the most peace it is a choice. You have the power to choose and making the choice is the first step to living your life empowered and moving in the right direction for your life.
2. Accept that people make mistakes. People let people down; it is part of life. When we focus on what others do we misunderstand that they are not perfect. Only Jesus was and is perfect and when that level of expectation is placed on others the mistakes they make reign control. When you understand and receive the revelation that people are not perfect and do not allow what they do to control you; you will be in better position to live in freedom and forgiveness of them for their mistakes.
3. Accept yourself. Accepting yourself is part of a lifestyle of forgiveness. Regardless of where you are or what you have done; self acceptance is a major component of living a lifestyle of forgiveness. When you accept your imperfections and mistakes; peace can enter.
The lifestyle of forgiveness is one that requires daily maintenance. Life happens. It’s what you do and how you handle it that matters. The choice ultimately is up to you. Forgiveness or unforgiveness is a lifestyle and the choice of what you choose is yours.