Have you ever thought about your choices on any given day?
In these times to come the Bible tells us more will be boastful, lovers of self; self-seeking and on it goes. One only need to look at commercials and television programs or the politics and see it! The Narcissistic Personality Disorder is truly operating yet the good news is that He came to set the captives free! And one way to get free is to be obedient to God’s Word where it commands us to forgive. There are no conditions just do it if you want to live in the abundance that Christ died for.
As you spend more time in God’s Word your life will change. It will become about more than what you have made it to be thus far. It will be about a purpose that you cannot get to while living in unforgiveness. Why? Because unforgiveness is direct disobedience to Christ. It is separation from God and it blocks your hearing from Him. How can you get to the place of knowing your purpose when you are separated from the One who has it?
Forgiveness is about overcoming self to be more about Jesus. It is about removing the NPD from your life to make it about something bigger, better and life lasting.
For more about forgiveness and love watch ‘Living in Forgiveness’ Monday-Friday at 9:30pm CST on the UANetwork. Check your local listing. Stream live at www.uanetwork.tv
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Failed relationships are not uncommon among people. They change, grow apart, find new interests, move; and a myriad of other things. While statistics continue to reveal that in marital relationships; the divorce rate continues to increase although there is much debate as the cause. The current divorce rate for first time marriage is higher than 50% while for second or third marriage it is said to be even higher.
Many will say that the cause for divorce is marriage which is true; however, it is much deeper than most people will discuss or even recognize. The rate for couples going their separate ways after living common law is also increasing since more people are choosing to cohabitate compared to getting married. Toss into the mix the number of homosexuals who get involved in intimate relationships and additional statistics will reveal more broken relationships. The reasons? The so called relationships experts will claim the proverbial lack of communication, trust, times are changing, financial reasons; and more. While all of these may contribute; not one of them is the hidden core that is left un-investigated. In parent-child relationships it too is evident. Yes the problems may not be the same; however, the outcome still desecrates the lives of those who unknowingly let it.
It is the one killer of relationships that contaminates more people than cancer. It breeds to every area of a person’s life and causes much internal struggle, selfishness, rage, envy, control, bitterness and resentment. It takes no prisoners and it destroys lives through every thought, action; and future behavior. It breaks people down and tortures their lives beyond their wildest imagination. It is one thing that no pill or chemotherapy can cure. It is something so small that can change one’s life in a matter of seconds to the detriment of everyone involved. It ruins lives without fail or hesitation to unsuspecting victims who are too focused on themselves to see what is actually taking their lives. What it is? It is un-forgiveness.
Un-forgiveness is very unforgiving in the pain that it is known to cause. Not only does un-forgiveness wreck havoc on a person spiritually; its physical manifestation is clear for all to see. Unforgiveness has been defined by Worthington and colleagues (Worthington, Sandage,& Berry, 2000; Worthington & Wade, 1999) as a combination of delayed negative emotions (i.e., resentment, bitterness, hostility, hatred, anger, and fear) toward a transgressor. It is clear to understand in this definition how the negative emotions lead to negative thoughts as well as negative or even criminal behaviors. Yes the almost 40 symptoms of un-forgiveness cause one to behave in a manner contrary to the Word of God; however, it is the un-forgiveness that is the root to the internal problem that destroys lives. In addition; for the Christian the consequences are much deeper with a much higher price to pay. Matthew 6:14-15 reads: “
14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (KJV)
There are a few words that must be further discussed in order to truly understand the importance of this message. The first word to understand is ‘if’ because this places the responsibility on the person who needs to forgive. To be obedient to Christ this means that forgiveness is a command not an option for a rainy day. ‘If’ a person forgives ‘then’ he or she will be forgiven. It is also important to note that there are over 176 places in the Bible where ‘If you then I’ are stated. There is no way around obedience to Christ through being unforgiving toward anyone for their actions. And if you want healthy, sustainable, godly relationships, family, community and society then it starts with you; and it starts with you living in forgiveness.
Love in today’s society must reign. it doesn’t matter what part of the world or who you are. Love must reign. It must if we intend to live as Christians. And in these times; we must stand in accordance with God’s Word to love our neighbors regardless of what we think of them. We must love and be prepared in and out of season to walk and live in love.
In a recent conversation; I listened to a story about a group of people were discouraged and disappointed after studying and watching to learn about the Shemitah, the blood moons; and other various things that were expected to take place.
These people followed along intently and believed all the words spoken and all the concepts taught; and waited for what would occur. Sounds great right? Except; it didn’t. The expected calamity did not strike on the day or the days that were prophecied. As a result; the group was left with a bitter taste in their mouths.
Situations like this are not uncommon; they are just not probably talked about daily at the dinner table. It is one though that leads us all to be prepared and in a way that only is in love.
You see; you can be the best prepper and listen to this alleged prophet or that and have every study guide and 2,000 rounds of ammo but if you have no love for your neighbor you have nothing. What do you think you will do when calamity strikes and you instead of love; hate? What will happen to not only your neighbor but to you as well? If you allow yourself to get discouraged by one person then what will happen when there are three or four or more that have a false word? There can be no room for anything but love; and love for another.
No one is doubting that these are tough times for the world. One doesn’t need bifocals or binoculars to see it. It’s here. Look around. Some are looking for that specific date except the largest clue that is evident when Jesus spoke these words in Matthew 25:13: “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour.” (NIV) The search to know this or that instead of focusing on love and hearing from God will only serve as a distraction and right now; who needs more distractions?
It is time that in order to know and be in the know that it isn’t about this person teaching or speaking that; but the Almighty God speaking directly to you. Period. When you get to a place of hearing directly from Him and in love- you will be more prepared for anything than you can possibly imagine.
There is much going on in the world today. Your world; my world. The world that neither of us are in. It’s all changing and the time is now to be prepared. The time is now. Apostle Paul makes it clear that we must be prepared. We must be prepared in and out of season; but what exactly is the ‘in’ season? What is the ‘out’ season? If you look carefully isn’t any season you are in the the ‘in’ season? Therefore by deduction you must be prepared at all times in all ways for all things. You must be. But in what way? All ways.
We must first prepare our hearts to live in love and forgiveness. There is no way other than this. You cannot wait for a disaster to strike to love and reach out to your neighbor. You must now. You must fill your heart with love and forgiveness overrunning.
We must stand firm in faith. If you struggle ask for more faith. The disciples did. They knew they needed an increase in measure. Why? Because in order to forgive they would need faith. Luke 17:4-5 is clear: Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.” The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!” (NIV) Ironic too that they needed faith to forgive. Do you? Ask and receive!
Now while standing firm in faith in the Lord is one thing; it too requires action. Remember that faith without works is dead so when it appears the world may be falling apart around you what are you doing to be prepared so that you can stand and not fall faint of hunger? You must be able to stand as how can you help your brothers and sisters in need? It is not time to be dependent upon others but upon the Lord so that you can be of service to others on His behalf.
It got me thinking to say the least. How prepared am I? What do I need to be prepared for? What is my faith level? What is in my heart? Not only this; what is in my pantry? You see; we must be prepared and in all ways. Winter is here are you ready?
In Colorado growing up people were prepared for winter. It was normal life. People had gardens and the crops were canned for winter. It was life. That was the norm. Those of you who grew up in climates similar can relate I’m sure. The blizzard of 1982 was one such example. It came on Christmas Eve. It’s not one people soon forget. The other ones that people still talk about are 1997 where in Coal Creek Canyon 56″ of snow was reported in less than 12 hours. In 2003 people were snowed in for at minimum 5 days. Because some cities outlawed driving people skied to the nearest grocery store; before everything was shut down. How ingenious right? Yep wear a backpack and ski to the market. You do what it takes and have what you need in order to complete the task. You can’t drive and for me that year I didn’t get out for more than 5 days. Nothing like being snow bound!
Living in climates like Denver people have 4-wheel drive vehicles- and they moreso know how to drive in the conditions too. In most cities across America; people aren’t equipped for such weather as snow and ice; or even cold. We can look around and see the weather changing and vastly. Many talk about global warming yet it’s been the opposite so figure that one out. So are you prepared? Some say living in Texas the weather is changing daily. At least it’s daily. Other places it’s hourly! I remember in Denver laying out at the pool in the morning and by evening experiencing 2″ of snow. In other words have sunscreen and hot chocolate handy every day. Even in July you can get snowed in the foothills in as I’ve experienced that too.
In reflection of a few things that would be necessary for survival is one that has thinking I need to step up my game. Dallas is different and regardless of where I live or where you live; you must be prepared. You don’t want to be cold and bitter now do you? See; grocery stores only have supplies for three days. Three days! What if the weather is so bad that the power is out longer than that? Or what if where you live the weather is ok but where the goods come from the weather isn’t? What if the weather is so bad that the trucks can’t even get to your city to deliver the products you need? What then would you do? It occurs to me that there are some things I need to take care of. It’s not like I will be able to just use my cell phone and order pizza. And if I could the two hour wait for it to arrive cold may not be the best either. So it’s best to just be prepared. Love, forgive and have extra toilet paper.
A few things to think about to be prepared are:
1- Water. Of course everyone needs water so this goes without say. If you start now stocking up on water then you are set for drinking but what about the other areas of your life? What about showering, cooking, or anything else. Don’t you need to be able to flush the toilet so you may need more water? It takes about one gallon to fill the tank so keep some on hand just in case. If you have the drinking water do you really want to pour that down the toilet? The large blue containers you can fill up with a few gallons of tap water and then store them in the garage so you have something. You wouldn’t want to store your drinking water in the heat in the garage as it will only take more like plastic than it already does. One thing I do is fill a gallon of water from the shower while I am waiting for it to heat. Yes it’s that much! The other thing I do is keep another gallon jug by the kitchen sink so that while I am waiting for hot water I collect all the cold water. I use that to fill my dog’s water bowl and to water plants. Why pay money for it to go down the drain?
2- Food. Of course you have to eat and because you may not have electricity or know when it will be restored you definitely have to plan. I remember during the Superbowl when Green Bay played in Dallas during that week I had no electricity for a day. Needless to say it was cold from the ice storm. No one can drive on ice and keeping warm is obviously priority along with eating. Think about what you would eat for more than just one meal. What is your daily food consumption now? How long will the food in the refrigerator and freezer last? How would you prepare it? During the aftermath of Hurricane Ike many people grilled all their meat from the freezer since they had no electricity. I was told years ago to take old water bottles and fill them with water but not all the way full and then store them in the freezer for occasions just like this. Perhaps a few MRE’s and other items should be accounted for before it’s too late. Foods high in protein and require no cooking are the most obvious. Plan for additional foods for the children and infants in your family. Not only this; how often do people eat out of boredom? Planning now will help you know what you have so your level of irritability won’t be so high. The last thing you want is to get stuck with a Costco size container of old stale cheese balls.
3- Paper items. Toilet paper, napkins and other items are good to have on hand. Nothing would be worse than the last roll of toilet paper! Because water supply is limited doing dishes won’t be easy using paper products can serve the purpose. Count for how much toilet paper you use per month then perhaps an extra month supply would be good. Obviously if you are single you use less than a family of five; but still that is the last thing you want to run out of. One opened item of anything is never enough!
4- Protection. It’s wise to be able to defend yourself in all seasons. Bad guys are everywhere. While we must walk and live in love and forgiveness we must be wise too. Keeping current with firearms training and having ammunition is just prudent. My CHL is current and being proficient in using it doesn’t take much time out of my life. It’s just one of those things that is no different than taking care of the laundry or baking cookies.
5- Toiletries. As I said before an opened anything is never enough. Are you at the bottom of the shampoo bottle? Last roll of the toothpaste? What then if you run out before the weather clears and your store is restocked. How terrible would it be to not be able to brush your teeth for a few days or weeks?
6- Lighting. Candles of course can work just great; but how many would you need to use for light and warmth? When I look around my town home I see 20ft ceilings with an open floor plan which means all the warmth going everyone else except to me. I would need to get creative with where I would spend my time because I obviously don’t want to waste my candles. My personal idea is pretty simple. My bathroom is a decent size and is closed in so it would make the most sense to set up shop in there. I would set up an air mattress in the bathtub and that room would be the warmest with less heat escaping. I would roll a towel in front of the door so that no heat could escape; or at least very little. Sitting on the air mattress also gets me off the floor where it isn’t warm. Because my dining room, kitchen, living room; and bedroom all have windows using candles simply would be better in the bathroom. GE sells the LED lanterns that take D batteries so for 20 bucks I have light and with my candles have warmth. Don’t forget the matches or lighters. I have a fireplace that was one thought although the bathroom would still provide better options for longer warmth because the heat could be contained.
7- Pet food and supplies. You can’t let your pet go hungry now can you? Of course not! My Olive needs her food too. How much does your pet consume daily? What about flea, tick or heart worm medicine? Having these items on hand will only help you better protect your animal. Perhaps a few extra treats or raw hide bones would serve as a distraction from the situation. You may also think about a dog sweater or sweatshirt. While most with the purse dogs spend more on these items; your lab or Great Dane may need one too!
8-Prescriptions. While it’s easy to call the pharmacist to place the prescription order on most days; you most likely wouldn’t have phone service to make the call or be able to get to that location to purchase it. Having enough supply on hand is wise as you would have to have your mother or child suffer those consequences! Or better yet; have essential oils and recipes on hand. Sure it may be great to think you can hop online to find those recipes; except if you have no power for any length of time is this realistic?
9- Extra glasses or contacts. If it’s dark and you lose a pair of glasses now you are stuck. Stuck using your light to go search in the cold of the night to find them when if you had an extra pair in an easy to find location you would be just fine. You would hate to harbor unforgiveness toward yourself for not taking care of this oh; years ago when your spouse mentioned it. You don’t want to hear the proverbial ‘I told you so’. This is one thing on my list without a doubt! I’ve never lost a pair but that doesn’t mean an extra pair wouldn’t be beneficial. I’m also learning that too many things that can be done tomorrow can wreck havoc on it too! Tomorrow eventually becomes today so why not just do it now?
10- Blankets & Down Comforters. If you happen to be like many bachelors you may just have your sheet and comforter that you sometimes use; or even perhaps you have the old quilt from someone years ago. Having enough blankets to keep you warm is a definite! If you hold up in one room you can always use one at the base of the door to keep any heat from escaping; or the towel as I mentioned. My favorite is my down comforter; although I have two other bed sets and numerous other blankets that I have picked up along the way. When buying a down comforter buy the one that has the most ounces of down per square. It may cost more although it is the best purchase you can make! I have had mine for almost 20 years and it is one item I don’t ever see myself parting with. This one item that can definitely serve it’s purpose. Of course if you have the sleeping bag that you use for those hunting excursions those will work just fine. Always keep blankets on hand because you can use them to create a bed in case and that will generate heat as well for you. You can also use the blankets to cover windows in addition to draperies as that will help keep the warmth in.
11- Generator. Sure you may not want to spare the expense of a few hundred bucks and no one blames you; except for someone who told you to buy one years ago. For those who like to really be prepared it may be the best way to go. While others may be suffering; those with the generators wouldn’t lose any power so perhaps it is something to consider.
While there are many other items to include like salt for the driveway or front steps, sturdy ice scraper; and a prepared mentality this is a good start. More people die in the cold of winter and the number of people who die from unforgiveness is evident too. Just be prepared by forgiving, loving and ensuring that you are able to take care of yourself. When that day comes you will be glad you did!
The most important command in the Bible is clear; and it’s serious. The command to love they neighbor it is written in Mark 12:31 ‘The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Interesting isn’t it? You may have grown up hearing it but not now where it comes from. I ask again- do you really love your neighbor? It seems in our society that we love twitter, we love a great shoe sale or Duke basketball; even when they miss a championship here or there. But do we love the obese man next door? Do we love the African American across the? Do we love the homosexual couple? Or do we just think we are speaking a good idea in theory?
See; all too often we interact with people and base whether we like them on political stances instead of the people themselves. You like more Democrats if you are one and well; Republicans too like their kind. The Bible is clear to love and missing that means we miss the entire point. Remember it was Jesus at the well speaking to the woman out of love. It was Jesus that died for your sins and for mine; and if you ever claim to be a follower of Christ but have no love then are you truly His follower? Everyone wants to be accepted for who they are and right where they are. Don’t you? The good news is that you are if you merely look to Jesus.
Today I ask you: “Are you loving your neighbor?” Are you living in the land of love or are you too busy judging others because they are not the size 2, driving the vehicle that you think is cool, or drinking your favorite beer? They don’t agree with your stance on refugees or Donald Trump and therefore you are just not ok with them. Are you forcing tolerance in the name of tolerance while being intolerant yourself? Are you looking down on someone because they don’t attend your 40k member mega-church? Or better yet; judging those ministers publicly because of something you think they stand for instead of realizing that in love you cover a multitude of sins? It is simply not the place of any of us to judge anyone as that in and of itself is sin. Who is anyone to look at the life and path of another and condemn them? Am I not just as guilty for the sins I have committed? Sin is sin and we have to remember that. Sure the outcome may be different but that simply is not the point for this moment.
It’s amazing how many don’t realize the magnificent and the magnitude of the words Jesus spoke before His death: ‘Forgive them Father for they know not what they do’ (Luke 23:34) and how true it is! People are hurting by their sins so why judge them even more?
I remember a few years ago I was walking out of a store and a strange gentleman asked me my plans for the evening. I replied ‘none’ and his reply was ‘oh another beautiful lady home on a Friday night.’ Ouch! What I saw though was that the pretty ladies are judged for their looks just as much as the not so pretty ladies; whatever they even look like. In the end- all are home alone on a Friday night and still be judged. And that’s not cool!
We are only called to love our neighbors. It’s that simple. None of us know the specific path that someone has been through. We just don’t. Know one has walked my journey with me except for Jesus and the same is for you. I will be dealt with on Judgment Day as will all of us whether we believe it or; like it or not or want it or not. Through all of this so long as we hold over those who we believe are more sinful than ourselves we are simply playing God. It is not up to any of us to place ourselves in that position as what we think today may be different tomorrow. It is only our responsibility and duty to reach out and love our neighbors and demonstrate that love so that others can see the light and forever be changed. It is our duty to love. And through forgiveness more love will come.
Forgiveness should be the lifestyle of everyone; and especially for those who are followers of Christ. After all; it is Jesus that set the example. What must be understood is the importance of forgiveness in the life of a Believer so that in turn; the relationship with Christ that he or she has will be able to develop into what it should be and for His glory and Kingdom.
When viewed in its purest form forgiveness is only able to be given when the heart and mind are focused in the right arena. It is when the Believer says I will obey all of God’s Word; and not just what I want for today that fits how I feel. See; it is written clearly, ‘We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ’ in 2 Corinthians 10:5. (NIV) You will not find where it is do it sometimes or when you feel like it. For forgiveness to be what reigns; it must be through the application of a right and sound mind and decision of obedience to God and His Word with a willing heart.
When unforgiveness is the lifestyle for whatever reason; all people miss out. Individuals, families, communities and even nations miss out. Unforgiveness keeps people focused on themselves and not on the larger picture or even the fact that Jesus died on the Cross for each of our sins. Whether you like Jesus or know Him not; He still died for you. Any and all unforgiveness keeps people living in sickness, disease, turmoil; and torture. To stay living in unforgiveness simply means living in obedience, selfishness, and a myriad of other things with the foundation sin purely being rebellion.
Please understand that forgiveness is 1) a process, 2) not for the weak. It is for those who recognize that people are people and none are any different. It is for those who wish above all to be obedient to God for the expansion of His Kingdom. All make mistakes and all fall short of His glory. The important factor to recognize is that forgiveness is a pathway for restoration and reconciliation to Christ and that should be the most important focus for any Christian. Forgiveness may or may not lead to reconciliation and restoration with people; however, through obedience to God the way will always be made for what God intends.
As a result; not only does forgiveness heal and restore it is a demonstration of healing and obedience but also love toward oneself, for Jesus and for others. See, in Mark 12:30 it reads, ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ If you live in unforgiveness you clearly are not demonstrating your love for Him because unforgiveness is the opposite of that. We continue to Mark 12:31 where it tells us, ‘The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.’ It is not possible to love others if you are not loving yourself. Unforgiveness not only limits your relationship with others, but yourself and obviously with Jesus. So long as there is a block within you- the block will be out of you as well. This hindrance is what reduces blessings from God but also any internal healthy relationships that are vitally important to growing God’s Kingdom.
It is vitally important that your life become one of forgiveness. This is not to say that what others may have done or not have done that wasn’t pleasing but rather harmful to you is acceptable. No. What it means is that you are demonstrating your love for Christ through forgiving. You are demonstrating your strength by living out in full what it means to be a Christian.You are being an example for others and that is vital for Christians to recognize. You are recognizing that while others are not perfect; neither are you. You are recognizing that not only has God will never leave you nor forsake you; He will give you the strength to do all things through Him who gives you strength. And that means you have it within you to forgive. You simply have to recognize the strength you have and the importance of what you give and receive when you forgive.
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There is much talk lately about identity theft and for good reason.What’s sad is that as much as it’s talked about; unless it happens to you there doesn’t appear to be much concern. What’s worse is that when it comes to identity in Christ; it appears even less are concerned. It’s a shame because without forgiveness in Christ there is no pure identity. And without that; people perish. Isn’t it time you got your true identity back?
When we go to the beginning we can see that it was all laid out accordingly; but because of free will people have the choice to grow closer to God; or depart from Him. Before Adam made the choice to be misled by his wife Eve; he had a clear identity and plan. It’s clear in Genesis 2:15-18. “The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. 16 And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.” 18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (NIV)
God gave Adam his identity and purpose; He created Him with one and the same is for you too. Obviously God and Adam had a relationship as well which is truly no different than people today; except many choose to forsake God through rebellion. They take what little identity they think they have created to go live a life they think is unto God yet know Him not. God knew Adam and Adam knew God. The plan was for Adam to take care of the garden and expand God’s Kingdom with his lovely wife Eve. What is your purpose? What are you doing to protect your identity in Christ?
While we know that Adam’s sin was putting his wife before obedience to God, that Adam was told to protect all that was in the garden; and that Eve was deceived. What we must recognize is that through the choice to sin; identity was lost. Period. When you make the choice to turn away from God to live your life your way; you lose out and in more ways than you can possibly imagine. Nothing was the same for Adam or Eve. It couldn’t be. Nothing will be the same for you either unless you choose the path of forgiveness in Christ to get your real identity.
Your identity in Christ is really all you have. Period. Outside of that you have and are nothing. Period. Sure you may have a nice title at work; but so what? Who cares? At the end of the day does it define you? And if it does what happens when you lose the job and title? Then do you allow the title of ‘unemployed’ define you? If your identity is found in the beautiful car you flaunt yourself in for everyone to see; why are you thinking so lowly of yourself that that is all you are worth is a car that depreciates every mile you drive? If your identity is created by sleeping with men with hoping they will love you knowing otherwise I want you to know that beyond it all there is something so much bigger in your identity!
You are worth so much more than you have settled for. I know this to be true because I have lived through the pain of not knowing. It wasn’t until I truly understood forgiveness, how to forgive, and what it even is that I started to have an identity. You see; unforgiveness separates you from God. It brings distance between you and Jesus. But once you make the choice to overcome you will have life and to the full. Acts 3:19 is clear: “Repent and seek forgiveness, so that times of refreshing may come.” (NIV) Your identity is part of the refreshing package!
As you forgive and truly seek the Lord for your identity in Him; your life will change. It has to! You will never be the same- in Jesus Name. The things of the past will no longer have the impact they once did. The people who used you, abused you; and reused you will have no power to harm you. They can’t. Those who stole from you will never be able to do because you know who you are in Christ.
The things that you gave away to get what you never could will be a thing of the past. You and your identity will be treasured in ways that could only come from Him. God’s Word is clear that He will never leave you or forsake you; and isn’t it time that you stop forsaking Him? It’s beyond time! It is time now for forgiveness to reign, for your identity to be restored and the real you to stand up for the assignment that He has waiting for you. That is what it is time for!
One of the largest issues facing many cultures and countries is fatherlessness. Children growing up without fathers are losing out. Whether or not a single mother raises her children; she still is not a father. A woman simply cannot teach a boy how to be a man. Just as much as the opposite is true. Men are needed and fathers must be elevated and celebrated. A father is more than what today’s society gives them credit for. We as a society cannot bow down or accept the notion that men are women, women are men; or that men and fathers are not needed. Without men- where would we be? The feminizing and diminishing of men and fathers needs forgiveness so that hearts and minds of people everywhere can change.
You see; men bring much to the table that people don’t recognize. Until we move beyond the mass media plan to remove men and fathers for all things women we won’t see the value of men. Imagine reading a Bible without King David; or even Jesus. Try reading a Bible without Adam and see how far you would get. There would be no life without a father; and God is the Father of it all. Whether you agree or disagree does not change the truth from being true. Men and fathers are needed. They have value. Period.
When we remove men and fathers from the equation we miss out on much. For example,
- 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes
- 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes – 32 times the average.
- 85% of all children who show behavior disorders come from fatherless homes – 20 times the average. (Center for Disease Control)
- 80% of rapists with anger problems come from fatherless homes –14 times the average. (Justice & Behavior, Vol 14, p. 403-26)
- 70% of youths in state-operated institutions come from fatherless homes – 9 times the average. (U.S. Dept. of Justice
- 24 million children (34 percent) live absent their biological father.
Children lose out and in big ways when fathers are not present. Just because a woman’s voice is louder does not mean men and fathers need not be heard. It is time for all to stand up for fathers!
The importance of fathers is one that cannot be escaped; regardless of what propaganda companies and the media want to distort your thinking to be. While sure there may be many fathers who are deadbeats; this does not excuse the scripture that makes it clear in 1Peter 3: “Wives, respect and obey your husbands in the same way. Then the husbands who do not obey the word of God will want to know God. They will want to know God because their wives live good lives, even though they say nothing about God.” There is a responsibility that women have to men and men have to women for it reads that men should love their wives. Just because a man or father may not be standing up as a woman would; isn’t because he isn’t able. It may just be that he has been so beaten down that his voice is gone. It’s time for forgiveness and reign and fathers to pick themselves up and women to be in the role of help mate so that we can live united in this society.
When men are disintegrated to nothing more than kleenex and portrayed as disposable it builds the stage for future generations to live in it. We as a society stop this eradication of men and what they contribute to society because we are only hurting ourselves in the long run. The Word commands all to honor their mother and father. It does not read honor their mother and mother. Hence; men are fathers and should be honored. Society needs to be reminded that it’s men who are leaders, breadwinners; men of God. Warriors and hero’s for their children. It’s men who are the majority of world leaders. It’s men God first created to begin mankind.
Through forgiveness on the parts of men for not standing up for themselves, women for diminishing men; and companies movements to feminize men we will be better able to see the value of men as a whole. We will be able to raise up future generations of children who will be in position to stand firm as boys to young men to men raising up their own future generations. This is a call of repentance of believing its acceptable to live in a society where men are not needed and that women are fathers on fathers day. It is an act of purest disrespect to dishonor people in such a way and if we all want restoration of our families it must begin with forgiveness. Forgiveness will restore families and through it; help us each to get over ourselves to recognize that we all must stand together united as a house or country divided cannot stand.
As we get closer to Fathers Day remember fathers. Remember the sacrifices they have made. While your father may not be the one you wanted; reflect and be thankful to God your Father who gave you life. Reflect on the fact that He will never leave or forsake you. He created you for a purpose and most likely it was not to put down a gender or role of another. And so on this fathers day relish in the fact that you have the power to be the change that the next father needs to raise up the next generation. And what an absolute blessing that is!
There may be a time in your life when people come against you. If there is stand strong. People are people and always reveal their ways. The jealousy, envy, greed or just plain hate may come against you by those who you love or work with; or even those who hate what you stand for. Your religion or beliefs may cause hate but what you stand for is what is important. When they do come against you with nothing good in store the message for you is quite simple. Forgive. You must forgive.
You see; the important thing to remember is that what is in your heart is reflected outward. So ask yourself: what it is my heart? Revenge? Payback? Hatred? Don’t let it enter. Cast down those thoughts! Take them captive. You are worth more than the negative thoughts of what others have done to you.
Those who have anger and all things negative are revealing much about what is in their heart. Perhaps someone you work with is jealous of the promotion you just received. Forgive. If someone in your church has come against you for the favor that God has given you; forgive. If your ministry is growing at a faster rate than others and they don’t like it; forgive. Whatever it is against you forgive. Those that come against you have no clue to their ways; but the God almighty does! And God knows what your ways are too. Let them be in proper alignment with Him.
The only thing that should be your concern is your level of obedience to Christ. Period. What other people do is not of your concern. What other people say about you is not your concern. What other people attempt to do to you is not your concern. It really isn’t. The only concern is your obedience and forgiveness for it is the Truth that makes you free.
The Word tells us that the days are evil and the enemy comes to kill, steal and destroy. Knowing this- it should be so surprise when people truly show who and what they are. When they do; forgive. It isn’t about them anyway. It’s about you and your relationship with Him. And on this day make all things about you about the One who created you. And then you will see more of His glory in ways unimaginable.
People are people and some are honest; while liars simply are not. Perhaps you work with one. Perhaps you married one. Or perhaps you are one. In any case; this is for you. You see; liars prove themselves what they are simply by their actions. It’s simply a matter of whether or not we pay attention to it. The signs are all there and while some are better than others; liars are always found out. And in such case as when they are; forgive. Forgive them because them and their lies are not worth the pain of even talking about it.
See; the thing about liars is that there is a deeper root operating causing them to lie in the first place. The lie typically is a deflection of the real situation at hand. It’s a cover up. It’s sick really when you are faced with someone who pretends to be one way and really they aren’t. The good news is that the when get the revelation your life will change! When you get that the person’s ways are probably not congruent with how you live then it’s time to forgive and walk away.
So how do you do it? How do you forgive a liar that masquerades probably so honest all the while treating everyone as though they are stupid? How do you get past the facade of someone who does business in dishonest ways? How do you reconcile someone who may even be in the church as a preacher who lies straight to your face? Simple. You make the choice for you my dear reader have all the power.
Through the process of forgiveness your life will change. It starts with you making the choice. These choices make it simple:
1- Make the choice to pay attention to what you know. More often than not liars have lied to you more than one time; but you let it slide. You justified it. You tried to accept that a white lie is a different kind of lie; not receiving that a lie is a lie is a lie regardless of the color. And your allowing the unforgiveness to settle in by accepting the lies you put yourself in bondage. Pay close attention so you can get free once and for all! Choose life!
2- Make the choice to act on what you know. You can know tons of things but that doesn’t mean you act on them. You know you need to eat better; but do you? You know you need to forgive; but do you? It’s one thing to know something and quite another to take the next step. For me for quite some time I ignored what I saw. That was my action; acceptance. Then when I saw it my life changed and how I acted upon it changed more.
I no longer sat in silence watching. Nope. I said something. And what happened amazed me! When I met in person with the liar what amazed me was that he wasn’t even sorry that he did it. It didn’t matter that not only did he lie to me; but to my mother and friend right to our faces. No apology. Nothing. The liar actually not only admitted it; but justified it. And- used the Bible! Yes- this is the extent that people will go to protect themselves and what you choose to do about it is on you. Period. There is no other way. If people lie to you and you do nothing; ask yourself why? If people lie to you and you don’t change the people surrounding you in your life ask yourself why? And then forgive yourself for allowing them to creep in to your life and forgive them for being sick because that really is what they are. Taking the step to forgive a liar will free you from the bondage of falling back into the trap of silent acceptance. You are worth more than accepting lies from liars.
3- Make a choice to live what you know. You know you need to forgive and make it a lifestyle; so why not start today? Why let the lies of liars come against you? You are worth more than that! Forgive them and move on. While sure we can all say liars are people too and that there is forgiveness for them; it doesn’t mean you have to allow the lies or the liars in your life. Remember that people will treat you the way that you allow. Choose and choose carefully. Choose life.
In the end; people reveal who they are in the day and the night. If you see it in the daylight; don’t think it will be different in the night for even in the darkness the truth is revealed. Don’t deceive yourself through justification and acceptance because the Word is clear that a doubleminded man is unstable in all his ways. Unforgiveness will keep you that way. The lies of liars will keep you that way too so it’s best to forgive, learn the lesson and live the lesson. Be honest and true and know that forgiveness is the way to getting free of liars and their lies.